Women in Poverty

I saw an article in the Kansas City Star news that truly says it all. "Those who helped others should not be left in Proverty" is the title.

Kathleen Hermes writes about the life of her mother-in-law who had passed away. Like many women, she was a wife and mother who gave much of her life caring for children, a husband, and parents. Hermes points out that this type of care is not given an economic value. Consequently, the poverty rate of women over 65 is twice that of men over 65. According to Hermes, only one out of five women will live out her life with a "financial safety net". The other four will die in poverty.

This IS 2008, isn't it? For more on this disturbing truth, go to www.kansascity.com.

PBS Special Comment

For the most part, I think the special "Caring for Your Parents" aired on PBS last evening was a good representation of what millions of families are going through.
Some people may be shocked by the day to day routine that is part of caring for your parents if you are not already into the situation. This was real life, not a movie.

Caring for loved ones can be a stressful and emotional experience. It can also be one of the most rewarding times of your life. One piece of advice I have stated in past blogs and was repeated on the program would be planning BEFORE a crisis strikes. It helps avoid the "unknown" situation, and gives the family an adjustment period
that fosters security, both for the parent in knowing they will be cared for, and the family in knowing how they can help.

I can't stress this point enough. Talk to your parents and know their wishes. Make your plans together. For more help with this or other questions on planning, please contact me at lmorrison@ffaionline.org.

PBS Special

If you haven't already heard, PBS is airing a two-hour special on Wednesday night called "Caring for Your Parents". In the program, they will be talking with actual caregivers about their situations and experiences. Following the program, there will be a 30 minute panel discussion by doctors and other experts that I hope will give more useful information and not just the same rhetoric we hear everyday. Of course, there may not be anything different to tell us. That remains to be seen.

Slow Medicine

There are times I wonder what it must feel like to be 85. Most of those times are when I take my mother on errands or when we take our 1 mile walk around the neighborhood.

Mother has begun using a cane some. I wish she would use it all the time, but she feels self conscious about it. She has a knee disfigured from arthritis and every once in a while, it gives out and she catches herself before she goes down. Any time we walk without the cane, I walk arm in arm with her. It's reassuring for her and I naturally slow down to accommodate her gait.

Slowing down is something we should all remember when dealing with seniors. I read an article online in the New York Times health section recently that talked of a book written by a doctor with his own mother in mind . The book called My Mother Your Mother embraces "slow medicine" as Dr. McCollough calls it. Dr. McCollough is a geriatrician and has several good ideas on the compassionate approach to caring for the elderly. Check it out and let me know your thoughts.